I haven’t been here in a while, have I? I’ve been writing in my mind, but I’ve been too tired and too dazed to be writing here, or even in my personal digital journal.

How are you…?

I’ve been…okay. I met Olivia again. Star and I don’t talk much. I’m curious to meet Nia next month as my schedule frees up some bit. I wonder if these names matter here? I wonder.

I’m still mad about the hair tie I lost when Olivia and I hung out at the mall. I kept it somewhere while playing with it and then just…forgot to pick it up. She had cramps. It was hard to watch. I tried to support her. Walking helps, she said. We walked a lot. It was anyway on our agenda. On the way to dropping her home, I was comforting her and she said, “You have a very calming presence.”

This… I am a block of melted ice right now.

Have you seen Erin Brockovich? Do you remember this scene?

INT. IRVINGS’ HOUSE – DONNA’S BEDROOM – DAY
Donna’s sitting quietly in bed. Erin is sitting on the edge of the bed.
Donna: I’d got so used to having ’em come up benign, I guess I just didn’t expect it.
She looks down her shirt front.
Donna (continued): Sure wish I had longer to get used to the idea. (beat) You think if you got no uterus, and no breasts, you’re still technically a woman?
Erin: Sure you are. You’re just a happier woman, ’cause you don’t have to deal with maxi-pads and
underwire.
Donna smiles a little. Then her face crumbles.

Erin Brockovich’s script.