It’s no shock I’ve been feeling “down” for more than 2 weeks now.

This week, Monday, it was particularly hard to “return” to work after the weekend. Very, very hard. I spent 2 hours just clicking around and figuring out what I’m even supposed to do. I begged my brain, “What is my job? What do I do? What am I supposed to do this week?” The rest of the day wasn’t much better. Thankfully, as I’ve gotten into the flow over the course of the week, I’ve been able to play catch up nicely.

Next Monday is not going to be easy. That, I know.

But… as Tuesday rolls in, as Wednesday lands, and as Thursday says hi, I start to feel better, start to feel like if nothing else, I am able to circle my days and my mind around work a little bit. A weekly catch-up with the whole team once, a couple of calls here and there, a few exchanges with different people on different matters… it feels okay.

I am breathing.

Things are moving.

Some kind of illusion.

It’s not the first time I’ve used work as an anchor in my life. Before, it was always a conscious decision. But it’s the first time I have this happening in a bit more…natural order. I find it a bit pleasant. Only wish the weekdays-weekend cycle wasn’t so bad. That feels hot and cold. Who likes hot and cold?