I don’t know if I will have any energy left after work to write. I’m taking ten minutes away from work right now, in the pre-evening, to say this.

Sexuality is fluid. Not just in that you might feel it towards different people at varying degrees, but even across time! That’s been a hard thing for me to grasp and to feel at home with. A label you choose today… identify with today is not your label for life. It’s not a prison cell you are subscribing to. It’s a tool. You’re always changing, always learning more about yourself, always having new experiences. It is okay to identify with another label as you move through the mess that is anyone’s life, as is mine and yours.

I remember feeling attracted to boys as well as to girls growing up. Was it very vague and rare towards boys? Yes.

I remember feeling attracted to boys in recent years. Stronger. Not all the time, but stronger when I did. It changed.

For a while, I thought I was straight.

For a while, I was bi-curious. I stuck myself into bisexuality eventually.

For a few days, I picked pansexual. Maybe non-binary people were attractive too, huh?

There has been an ever-present, lingering tendency to call myself a lesbian. Probably, yes, that has been the undercurrent throughout my life.

But now I identify as flux-romantic — bi-romantic sometimes, but mostly homo-romantic as the default. Gray-ace almost all the time right now. That might change. And when I look to a life partner, I definitively see only a woman. No label for that, is there?

Argh. Feels like a lot of “micro” labels. The point is…

You’re valid. I’m valid. We’re all valid. 🙂