I feel funny that some part of my mental health education is coming from Instagram reels these days. Is it really that funny, though, when it’s also a place to see relatable humour around mental health?

Someone used “pink clouding” in the context of healing from a relationship or someone who’s dealing with depression (the original context in which this term is used is sobriety). How someone might exhibit lots of joy and excitement and positivity towards life, and how it might die down at one point. How they might retreat back. Feel like they haven’t made progress after all. Disappear. Stop showing up. Stop doing new things. Stop being as… “fun.”

I think in recent days that’s where I’ve fallen. I’m taking days to respond to simple messages. Feeling those same patterns I’ve been trying to overcome… avoidant behaviour, anxious attachment, anxiety attacks, disinterest in music, lying in bed for hours doing…nothing of note. I even had two chocolates yesterday!

I am slacking a bit when it comes to diet. I’m very aware I’m trying to self-soothe with food, and I’m trying to avoid it/control it better. I don’t want to end up back where I was on the weighing scale, or… worse. Oh goodness no.